Perhaps you’ve heard the reports that during the CoronaVirus crisis lockdown there has been a severe uptick in domestic violence. These news stories are true. The Los Angeles County Police noted that 2 in every 5 calls right now are for domestic violence. 

That’s most likely for two reasons. One, there are not a lot of people outside, most are in their homes now due to the lockdown. So, there are fewer road rage incidents, traffic accidents, and home burglaries. Two, people who are forced to stay at home all day now, are getting into argumentative tiffs with family members since they are in close quarters and all cooped up together. Since neither party can leave the house, they are forced to settle their differences, and sometimes that doesn’t always end well.

Have you ever wondered how to get a Domestic Violence Restraining Order? Perhaps you can see the problem because you are not supposed to leave your house except for essential reasons. Luckily, going to get a restraining order for domestic violence is considered an essential reason to leave the home. 

You can go down to the police department and fill out the paperwork to get a restraining order, but it is the court, a judge that has to sign off on the paperwork. Once the judge signs off, he will give that order to the sheriff to serve the other party with the restraining order.

There are several types of restraining orders, for instance; there is a family violence (domestic violence) restraining order, and regular violence restraining order. There is also one for misconduct, which of course is called a misconduct restraining order.

If you are getting a divorce, it’s common to get a restraining order which is to keep someone from doing something. Then there are also Protective Orders which you can file to keep yourself safe from a dangerous person. The goal here is to keep the abused person or victim away from the abuser.

It generally takes up to 2 working days or 24-hours to get a restraining order or personal protective order. Once you file the paperwork within about an hour the process starts. It’s not hard to get a restraining order as long as you tell the truth and give complete answers on the form as to why you want to get the protective order. 

If the other person disputes it, they or their lawyer has the right and can ask you questions at a court hearing in front of a judge. During these questions, you only talk directly to the judge, not the other party.

No doubt you’ve heard of rich and famous people demanding a prenuptial agreement before they get married. You’ve probably even thought to yourself; that makes sense. After all, one person is super-wealthy and the other perhaps not so much. It would be insane if the person they married were to wait a few years and then demand half of everything and hire the best attorneys to litigate like hell on wheels. Prenuptials merely put gold diggers on notice; “It ain’t gonna happen!”

Legal contracts in marriage don’t always hold up the way you’d like them to. It is very interesting to read some of these prenuptial and postnuptial contracts, some of which have no chance in hell of standing up in a court of law if and when push comes to shove, and anytime there is a divorce, especially when it involves a lot of money, both parties and their attorneys tend to do quite a bit of posturing, pushing and yes, shoving too.

Some lawyers see prenuptials as a challenge to defeat. Yes, for this type of lawyer it is akin to the MMA of the legal world. Let’s discuss all this, but let’s get some definitions straight first.

• Prenuptial: Prenuptials are a written contract and agreement between two people before marriage. The agreement will list all the property and assets owned by each person prior to the union, and all the debts owed too. It generally stipulates who will get what in the event the marriage ends or one of the parties becomes deceased.

• Postnuptial: Post Nuptials are a written contract or agreement made after marriage or union which will stand as a guideline in settling the couple’s affairs in the event of a separation or divorce, or if one member becomes deceased. The contract also states who gets what assets and how the estate is to be divided.

You can see how the two are vastly different, and you can imagine all the reasons one or more of the parties involved would want such an agreement. These types of contracts are becoming very common in this day and age of ‘winner take all’ divorces where big attorneys (hired guns) go to war, each with the intent of winning. 

Both heterosexual and homosexual couples need to understand how these agreements work, what the benefits are, and understand all the future ramifications prior to signing or agreeing to any of the stipulations set forth. It also pays to find an attorney who specializes in this type of law because there is always new case law and the legal landscape is always shifting like the desert sand.

There has been some sweeping legislation involving paternity leave. Both male and female parents can ask for and are entitled to a reasonable amount of parental leave when a newborn enters the family. Much of these new rules were spearheaded by President Trump’s daughter who lobbied and fought for longer and fairer rules and new laws concerning the leave.

Before we get into the details of these new rules, it’s important to understand the definitions here;

• Paternity Leave: Paternity Leave is only for biological fathers and can be taken once the baby is born. 
• Maternity Leave: Maternity Leave is only for the biological mother. The leave can be taken while the mother is pregnant and after the baby is born.
• Parental Leave: Parental Leave is for either or both parents. It can be taken at the same time or at different times so that the baby is not left alone.

Parental leave has a very important purpose – bonding with the parents. If the baby is born to a same-sex couple then the biological parent involved in the birth can take the leave. If it is two women, the woman giving birth can take maternity leave, and the other can if the proper requirements were made under the ‘parental project’ law. 

If two men, then one can take paternity leave if his sperm was used to fertilize the egg of a midwife, or if both men’s sperm were used each can take paternity leave, although the law gets tricky here and you might want to consult an attorney who specializes in paternity leave law.

If all this sounds foreign to you, then you are not alone, as there have been new laws on this topic in recent years. For instance, the CFRA – California Family Rights Act, which is similar to the FMLA or Federal Marriage Law Act. These laws are for eligible employees and they can now take up to twelve weeks of paternity leave, albeit, unpaid leave.

There is a 30-day advance requirement of the father to notify his employer before taking leave. The employer cannot fire the employee and must take them back after the parental leave and give them the same or similar position and salary or pay. Companies that violate these rules stand to be slapped with big fines and face serious legal consequences. 

So, if you feel you’ve been wronged in such a matter concerning parental leave, maternity leave, or paternity leave you should contact an employment law attorney specialist as soon as possible.

Litigation is costly, and it involves an escalation of intensity in legal disputes, “a winner takes all” motif. California wants to prevent divorce disputes from getting out-of-hand and prevent unnecessary costly and time-consuming litigation. If every divorce case was litigated the courts would be jammed for decades. People need to get on with their lives and the courts have other important matters to deal with. 

Collaborative divorce law and divorce collaboration are when both parties agree to negotiate their division of marital assets without litigation. This allows the spouses to settle their divorces quickly and fairly with the best outcome for all concerned, which often includes children and custody issues.

How does collaborative divorce law work? Well, attorneys trained in collaborative law, who also know the case law surrounding divorce law work with financial professionals and coaches to help the parties with their mutual interests. This avoids unnecessary conflict and also turns out to be very good for the children. Divorce collaboration tends to mend fences rather than having all the hard work of the past reduced to rubble, as financial assets diminish and children are left with emotional scars.

Collaborative law is two steps below litigation and one step below mediation. Some consider it a form of alternative dispute resolution. Divorce collaboration focuses on solving problems without escalating the conflict. It often involves additional side contracts between parties that are attached to the divorce settlement. If done correctly, spouses can often settle the entire divorce without ever going to court – a truly amicable divorce. 

If all this sounds good to you, and it should, then it would be wise to find a divorce law firm that specializes in divorce collaboration. It will save you thousands of dollars and prevent animosity. It will also set you up in a better condition as you move forward to the next step of your life. 

What if it doesn’t work? Well, if it doesn’t work, then the collaborative lawyers will withdraw from the case. The spouses can then hire new attorneys and move to litigation or court-ordered mediation. 

During the divorce collaboration meetings and negotiations, everyone, including all of the attorneys are there for the right reasons, to settle the divorce amicably. To work together for a common cause and fair resolution. Are you beginning to see the benefits of collaborative divorce and why so many people are choosing it as their first option and best choice?

Generally speaking, divorce litigation should be the final choice and last resort in determining the distribution of marital assets. It is much better for the lawyers representing each party to come to an amicable agreement, sign off on the paperwork and report the settlement back to the court. Of course, that isn’t always possible. Remember, litigation can be very expensive and involve lots of billable hours on both sides. Win or lose, often both parties lose and the lawyers win. 

Unfortunately, sometimes divorce litigation is the only option when dealing with an unreasonable spouse out to take the other to the cleaners or out for vengeance. Let’s face it, emotions run high in divorce cases and there is always lots of blame to go around. Often there are kids involved and their interests are also a top priority, not only with the spouse being granted custody, but it is also a concern of the court. The children’s welfare and safety are something the courts take seriously. 

Another issue is spousal support – how much? Too much and it seems quite unreasonable to the spouse who will be paying far into the future. Too little and the other spouse cannot adequately survive, and could become reliant on social services paid for by the taxpayers. Something the court and family services definitely frown upon.

One of the biggest issues is personal and real property and the dividing of assets – who gets what? What must be sold and how will the proceeds be divided? Sometimes, there are tax consequences to go along with that. One big stickler to all this is fraud upon the court. Things like the hiding of assets, purposely overestimating expenses and under-reporting actual income. It’s amazing how much of this goes on during divorce litigation. 

Resolving a divorce through litigation should be a last resort, as it is much less expensive to mediate or work with a collaborative divorce strategy. If for some reason the parties cannot reach an agreement, then there is no other option but to litigate. While there is definitely a lot of case law on the books when it comes to children, child support, pensions, retirement accounts, and spousal support payments it gets a little trickier in complex cases that involve business interests, real estate holdings, and other assets. 
Divorces involving millions of dollars in assets or even 10s of millions of dollars often mean bringing in the big guns, powerful attorneys who specialize in winning for their clients. It’s a hostile environment and the two parties are at war until it’s over. It’s often not pretty. If you are going to go there, make sure you hire the right divorce firm that can craft a winning divorce litigation strategy.